Welcome To My Thoughts!!!!

Hey everyone welcome to On The Chaise Lounge. This is my blog where I will be writing my thoughts on everyday life as I see it. They say the best therapy is writing down your thoughts and getting them out in the world so that is what I am going to do here, and its much cheaper than paying someone to hear my thoughts when I have tons of friends that can chime in and let me know what they think. This is going to be free flowing no real theme, just real random stuff from relationships, to sports, tv shows, the topics are endless. I want to welcome you again and hopefully through you, my followers, so I can get some understanding about the world and hopefully solve my issues.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Am I my brother's keeper!!!

    Last Sunday while at  my weekly basketball game, one of my teammates brought his two kids to the game.  His daughter is about 10 and his son is about 5, so as I sat on the bench with them, they were playing just being little kids.  The daughter turns to her younger brother an says "I LOVE YOU!!!".  It was the sweetest thing I have seen in my life.  From the way she said it you can tell it was from the heart
nevermind that her brother was trying to karate kick her, it didn't matter to her she just wanted him to know he was special to her.

    This really got me to thinking about my siblings, and or relationship.  I don't know what it is about seeing siblings being so loving but it really makes me smile and wish I had that growing up.  My brother and sister are both older so when I was growing up they were in college and off being adults.  I don't think I ever really formed a strong bond with them because of two reasons.  1. We are step brother and sister, even though growing we never used that word, we just said my brother or my sister ,but the fact is still we only shared a father. 2. I didn't see them that much, maybe a summer here or there but  they were both in Florida. Maybe that's my dad fault for not bringing us together to form that bond most siblings have but we never really spent that time needed to get to that level of sibling love.  I am not saying we don't love each other, we just aren't close.  We don't talk ever, for example I haven't heard from my brother going on 4 years now.  All I know he lives in Florida.I don't know how my nephew is doing, if he is doing well, how his life is going nothing.  My sister lives 30 minutes down 95 south from me, teaching school 15 minutes from me but I never see or talk to her either.  I will take some of the blame for not speaking to them because just like they don't reach out to me, I don't reach out to them.  I could reach out, say hello,  try to make that bond between us happen but the point of the matter is I really don't want to, and there is no point in my eyes.  I know that sounds harsh but the truth of the matter is it wouldn't last.  It would be good for a little while then go back to the way we are now, not talking ever then when we see each other we pretend we love each other so much.  I am too old for that, I am about actions and I have other people who have become siblings to me and I truly love them for filling that void in my life.

    To my extended siblings I want to take this time to say THANK YOU!!!  You know who are so there is no need to write the list out but just know that without you I wouldn't be who I am today.  The fact I have people that care for me, put me in check when I need it, and allow me care for them the same way is amazing and blessing to me.  You get me through so many situations, as well as give me a standard to live my life.  When I decide to have kids that is going to my mission is to make sure my kids love and respect each other.  Those little kids at the game really showed me the example I want for the next generation of Miles'.   Maybe one day a relationship between me and my siblings will be establish because I do believe anything is possible, but right now my void has been filled and I know my brother's keeper.

3 comments:

  1. Lol, can totally relate to my brother karate chopping me, and me giving him a hug when he's finished. You've got a great family of true brothers from another mother (and father)! Great post :-)

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  2. I can relate. I have extended (my choice of words) or step-siblings from my dad's past marriage and indiscretions...but we were not raised with them. I was raised with my older sister, Felisha, and my younger sister, Alisa...so to me, those are my sisters. I do not think I care to have a relationship with the extended group either, nor do I think they care to have a relationship with me. Guess that's the way the cookie crumbles. And I too think that I have some friends that I consider closer to me than I would my siblings...especially my older sister...although, I'd die for her, I wouldnt tell her ass my deepest secret...she's conniving and vidictive...

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  3. I'm feeling this one. I'm not as close to my brother as I was as a child but oh how I remember the fights we use to get in because I wanted to follow him around. Or the time he flipped me over in a shopping cart and begged me not to tell mama...of course I told and laughed the whole time he got a beaten. LOL! But I do remember a few things about my brother that stuck out the most...he always protected me, he never let me go hungry and he always made me feel safe. We've drifted apart over the years, mainly becuase he's locked up but come Nov. he'll be home and I'm excited about starting a new with him.

    The love my brother showed me has remained a constant in my life regarding my friends and the love and protection I feel for them. Although we're not related by blood I still consider them my brothers and sisters and love them as if they were and I'd do anything for them because I love them just that much.

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